Thoughts from Lucy

Gosh people go through some bad things. I dont know, but not everyone has to deal with these horrid things... do they? Reading other people's blogs is so interesting, i mean its alright you say you know your friends and what their lives are like, but on blogs you really can see what they feel its fascinating...
i think this blog site is so useful especially for teens with issues, its kind of like a release system, its like an online diary that talks back to you if you want it to be. its also a tool to discuss any news, or anything that intregues you, with people. i started this blog a couple of days ago just so see what it is like i guess. i dont want people at school to read this necessarily. i find its nice to have people read your blogs who wont judge you...

I suppose I should be an expert on this topic. I have had my fair share of boyfriends. My mother once said to me that I need to have someone, I am just one of those people who always needs to have a boyfriend for whatever reason. I wasn’t sure what to think of that, should I be offended? Am I really that dependant on my someone else? Am I not strong enough to be on my own? I honestly don't know. Its true I haven't gone very long without a boyfriend. Don't get me wrong, its not because I need someone sexually at all, having stayed with someone for nearly 9 months and not done a thing. I think its more of the emotional support I need. I love to have someone to talk to, who I can tell anything and always rely on. But more importantly I love to love. I am with someone now and I am completely besotted with him, we are both crazy about each other and have had talks about living together in the future, you get the picture.
Even though I love to love, I have been hurt so badly in the past. Beyond what one could imagine, have you ever fallen in love and had your heart completely ripped apart? It sounds silly, 'I'm young!', 'Boys are just for fun at this age'. But the feelings we get are so real, we believe in the stupidest things and we worship love, its the most exciting thing in this horrid period of pressure and exams. So one has to watch one's self, when falling in love.
I get asked by many of my friends, ''how do you know your 'In love'?'', ''maybe you just love him, there is a difference between the two, you know!''. Well to be perfectly honest, what I feel is so intense sometimes that it's what i believe now and maybe when I grow up and time changes my feelings will change but what matters is now.

Me? I'm just an ordinary girl in an alien environment, struggling through school and trying to master this crazy world. I have a decent life, I am in my penultimate year of school. I'm taking the IB which is the International Baccalaureate. I live in Switzerland with my family but I'm originally English, born and raised in London. I suppose you could say I'm a typical adolescent with big dreams, my ultimate career aspiration would be to be involved in musical theatre. But we shall see if that will ever happen. I decided to start a blog because I sometimes feel the urge to write, my boyfriend's mother has her own blog site, so i thought i might as well try.